Wednesday, May 4, 2011

life training

I was talking with a friend of mine the other day about a parenting book she had recently completed.  She said {sort of in jest} the problem with parenting books is that at the end of them you realize that it is not your child that needs to change but you.  Yikes!

I have simplified what she said because it's my blog because I can't remember word for word what she said, since it is really the point she made that stuck me not the actual words she used.  Basically, we discussed that we knew what we wanted our kids to do and how they should act but we weren't always consistent.  And our lack of follow through or giving instructions multiple times caused us to be frustrated and {sometimes} even yell at our kids. 

So I'm happy to report, I've got it all figured out now!  Just kidding.  I know that change, any change, takes time and planning.  So I looked at a few behaviors in my kids that I wanted to change and needed to have them change in order for them to be successful later in life.  That's right, I'm now looking long term at the implications of certain actions or non-actions on my part.  I'm reading a book called Ready for Responsibility by Bob Barnes and he talks about training your children now to handle the situations they will face later in life and be successful in those situations.

As a result of this book and this conversation, we are doing some training here at Casa Isabella!  One area I started on was getting their own snacks.  We reorganized our pantry so they could actually reach the food and placed bowls at their level.  My kids have pretty free access to snacks all day long since they are such good eaters.  I typically only let them have fruit or veggies within an hour of dinner time but the rest of the time they can choose their own snacks.  They are also responsible for packing their own snacks to take with them to school daily.

Another area of responsiblity is John is learning to make his own breakfast and lunch.  I walked him through all the steps of this process.  And I really broke it down into small steps which seemed like too many for me but I tried to remember that he hasn't made 23,596 waffles like I have. 

Here he is before church on Sunday getting waffles ready for everyone.  Pay no attention to all the crap on my counters, I didn't think have time to move everything. 

Here he is today before school, training Luke on how to make a waffle. 

And here they are with the finished product.  One problem we have is that John gets mad if no one orders a waffle for him to make for them.  Another by product is that he is convinced that they taste better since he made them!

Next up, how to make your own lunch.  So far our life training seems to be going well...

1 comment:

Peter and Nancy said...

Good job, mama! I have to work on some kitchen stuff with my sons (who are older than yours), such as learning to wash dishes by hand. They load and empty the dishwasher (and my daughter does the silverware), but I need to teach them the old-fashioned way!

I saw your post in a Blogher sidebar, and since I'm an adoptive mama too, I had a hunch you might be. We are waiting for our 2nd daughter from India. It looks like you're doing a fantastic job being an advocate for Grace! God bless you,